I believe that would be the customer........

Her come on line: "Would you like a donut ho?"

Cream or custard filled?

Time to make the ho nuts.

Can I have some cream with your coffee?

Would you like danish instead of a donut? I'm danish.

Why use the drive through when you can "come" inside? (I know, I spelled it incorrectly so I don't cross the line. ) :-)

Hi Officer, it's not what you think, I'm just a lapkin. You know, a napkin so you don't spill anything on your lap?

We started a new service where we charge by the inch.

Cock a doodle do.

That's all I got. Taking my soapbox to the local bakery.

I bet some customers were surprised when they asked for an extra tea bag.

how bout some sugar with that coffee? one hump or two?

Is it extra for the chocolate sprinkles?

Sign out front "Late Night Specials. Tiger tails 2 for $1. Hand jobs $2. Hands washed between servings upon request."

It kills me how many guys will pay for handies and head from skanky women while so frequently turning down my offers of such things for free, even though I'm actually rather attractive, and certainly better at all that stuff than any woman ever could be. Just goes to show how stupid men tend to be, which is why they make such lousy pets. ;)

Seriously, though, did they arrest any of her Johns? It's only fair to go after those who bought her services if they're going to arrest her for offering them. But, I'm willing to bet not a single one of these guys (assuming all her clients were male) gets charged with anything. It's sickening, really, that they almost never charge the customers of prostitutes with anything.

Hey...these donut holes taste fishy!

L.J. Rhodes

frequently turning down my offers of such things for free

Sucks, sincere good luck on the dry spell.

In my experience, and I expect you know this, sex is never free.

Ever see this Brendan Behan attributed quote?

The big difference between sex for money and sex for free is that sex for money usually costs a lot less.

So that's why COPS are ALWAYS hanging around DONUT SHOPS!!!

Wonder if she washed her hands. Repulsive.

Ha...Oh so true Atheismo.

With me, it truly is free. I'm whole-heartedly NSA. ;)

@L.J. Rhodes

you're mad men prefer the service for a fee instead of your free service, Gee I wonder why. You claim to be better at it, and its free. Yep that dunken donuts employee is the skank.

Chances of "your free service" having a disease is much higher then a paid service. Now im not saying you have such diseases but don't blame a guy because he doesn't want to sleep with a free piece of ass instead of paying for a "cleaner" source of it.

Honey, hos are hardly cleaner pieces of ass than those of us who don't do it for a profession, especially when they, as paid workers, tend to get up to even freakier stuff than we regular Joes do. I do what I do for fun, so I'm under no obligation to do anything unsafe, or even "all the way." But, considering most guys will pay a woman to do no more than I do for free, it still points to their being too stupid even to make good pets, as the assertion that prostitutes are cleaner and safer than the general public makes clear. ;)

L.J. - most guys want a woman, not a regular Joe like you - even if it is for free. If it came down to it, most guys would prefer a skank than a regular joe like you.

Is this the reason Homer Simpson gets so excited about donuts?

@L.J. Rhodes

you clearly misunderstood my point, its not being cleaner then you, You say you're an attractive woman, you offer it for free, and certainly better at it. If a guy wont take you up on your "skanky" offer then there's a reason besides the "oh its free? No thanks I'd rather pay for it". You're either lying about something or when you "offer" this free service of yours your giving off the wrong vibe. It's nothing about men being stupid. It's about you trying to trap them, or you make them think you're trying to trap them.

And that compare men to pets comment? Seriously? too stupid to be good pets? Yep, you're most likely a control freak, a total turn off to most men.

Nowhere does L.J. Rhodes say he is an attractive woman. Here is what he says, wiz -

"I'm actually rather attractive, and certainly better at all that stuff than any woman ever could be."

He is, in my opinion, quite representative of the homosexual community in general.

Utter, Good one. LOL

Freedman1,

How's that? Smarter, more attractive and better at sex than the straight community in general? You're absolutely right. ;)

Thanks Tony, although I don't think measures up to some of yours on this thread ;)

Its funnier. I can't stop saying MMMM Donuts in a Homer voice. LOL

Maybe the reason LJ can't give away free hand jobs is he is Edward Scissorhands' twin brother.. Yikes!!!

She knows how to make Long Johns and JOHNS LONG HAQHAHAHAAHA

Must resist urge to make puns and risk getting banned for vulgarity. GRRRRRRR!

A Dozen "Donut holes on a String" $1.

You are right. Its hard finding clean comments to make. Why do they do this to us!!

Wonder what you would get if you ordered a long john instead of just 'extra sugar'??

#1 For short and SWEET!

... and the cream filling.

kruller, your choice of color.

...and then she went and touched your food. Ewwww. You don't know where her hands have been...or maybe you do.

It's bad enough the teenages at the fast food places don't wash their hands.

...and that's why you don't eat fast food!

Who in the heck has the ignorance to say "HEY! You better wash your hands and keep a sanitary environment around this fast food food place! Now... where is my 88 cent taco and my 1 dollar hamburger????"

In addition, if you are going to Dunkin Donuts that late into the night, you should be making some serious life evaluations.

But markutk, i only went for the sex...

Well, that's perfectly acceptable, good sir! Word on the street was that 2:00-3:00 a.m. was happy hour. Was that true, or just a myth?

No, the police just don't want anyone f**king with their donuts.

Must have been pressure from Washington, D.C. They have definitely refined screwing people into an art form!!!

Reliant, is that really f---king WITH the donuts or just f---king the donuts? Or maybe it's all a bit nuts.

Might even have run into WuWu, bet he would be at the head of the line to dunk hi...........never mind again.

Yeah, but he had to pay for her services. There is a legal way to do this in the US...it's called marriage. ;)

I think George Carlin put it best. "Why is it illegal to sell something that's perfectly legal to give away for free?"

The man made a lot of sense Toasty.

Jessica I disagree with you, sex ends with the wedding cake.

Brad - I'm sorry for your loss!

Sometimes you marry a Boston Cream but it turns into a Kruller.

Wasn't a loss, I divorced her.

There are lots of ways to make creme horns and long johns!

or JOHNS long

heeheehehehehehehehehe

I concour. Morality laws are almost always bad laws.

I'd even question the morality of the laws. There's nothing moral about outlawing prostitution.

The world's oldest religion. Demand for this industry never goes out of style. Why fight it? Make it safe, make it voluntary.

Morality laws like murder, rape, incest, stealing, robbery, and the like?

Guess what all those have in common with prostitution, Mike.

Absolutely nothing.

"Prohibition makes everything more dangerous." If that is true, then it must follow if we do not prohibit anything we will live in a safety? An anything goes society.

That sounds pretty dangerous to me.

in some cases, the harms of prohibition is obvious. in other cases, the benefits are obvious.

prohibition on prostitution makes prostitution dangerous...working women must put themselves out in uncertain situations, many are murdered, many are raped, many are taken advantage of. with legalization, these women could be protected as well as clients. they would be regulated to certain districts or businesses...these women and clients would be taxed. they would be required to have up to date bloodwork, to prevent further spread of STD's. with prohibition, STD's have a better chance of spreading to to everyone and ultimately your kids. clients would be required to have up to date bloodwork as well. it would be easier to fight STD's when you can keep track of it better and prevent it better...legalization would help cut sexual crimes. how many prostitutes have been murdered by physchos out there? how many could have been saved if it had been legal in the first place? if it was legal and monitored, not only would the safety of these working women be guaranteed, but the criminal element of society would be better monitored...i see nothing about prohibition of prostitution that makes things safer for us...

in other cases, prohibition clearly makes sense...i.e., the prohibition of murder. yep, don't need to say more...

indeed, prostitution has been around since the beginning of times, even Jesus had no problem hanging out with prostitutes...let those who have no sin cast the first stone. lemme tell you, Jesus was sin-free, but he didn't cast no stone, did he? oughta be a lesson in there for ya.

Besides stuff like "don't hurt others", there's very little that works for everyone. Therefore there are very few morality-related things that should be legislated.

I am wondering what union they would fit into.

Pipefitters?

And make crack legal as well

work the donut wHole

crack kills. prostitution does not, especially when protection is used. even as parody, legalization of crack has no similarity to legalization of prostitution. fail.

LMAO!!!!

YEAH!!!

She knows how to make Long Johns and JOHNS LONG HAQHAHAHAAHA

They do...notice that their time spent there didn't cause any action...it was a tip to the police department that forced them to shut her down...likely they had been enjoying the above and beyond level of service offered at their frequent stops... ; )

tiredof the crap. Was it a Police TIP. That got her caught? Or the polices tip. To the owner?

POLO! Oh man that's gross! Funny but gross.